Y - Yearning #AtoZChallenge


Of all friendships, the ones at college are the best. These friends are the ones who truly know you and accept you. Of all the friends I have, this one particular friend Yashita is special. She understood me, always. Since the first day of the college, our opinions have always matched. She liked things the same way I did. I thought it was a coincidence in the beginning. However, too many of them made me believe that it meant more. I proposed to her after the final exams. She rejected me right away.

‘Maybe our opinions match a lot. Maybe you are the perfect match for me. Maybe we could make it work. But I don’t feel the same love for you, which you claim towards me. Are you willing to be with a who is perfect for you, except she doesn’t love you? I don’t think this is love. You love the feeling of being in love with me. We still are friends, but nothing more.’

I backed off then.  I was glad she didn't break our friendship. She stayed my friend but sometimes behaved like I meant more. She had earlier said that I was the best match, which means I just have to prove to her that she loves me. Once she realises that we could be the best couple in the college. Till that plan works out, I was willing to be her acting boyfriend, a boyfriend with the tag of a friend.

Things were working fine, she trusts me the most and that’s when she met my sister. They became good friends, and I assumed that would mean my love story would get a happy ending. Nothing that sort happened. My sister ruined it all. They spent a lot of time together, the time we used to spent together earlier. They also became best buddies very soon and planned a trekking trip. With my sister becoming her best friend, I became just a friend. I wasn’t the acting boyfriend anymore. I was her best friends brother.

‘She's my sister, she wouldn't mind. I can join you, if you want me to. You know I love trekking, right?’

‘No you don’t.We are going because this has been on my bucket list since long and she loves adventures. Also, it is a girls only program. Thanks for offering, but it's already planned perfectly. Sorry.’

When they returned I hoped she'd give me some sign that she still cares about me. I got nothing. I decided to propose again. She rejected again.

‘Then I can't be your friend anymore. Goodbye.’

I said that and went away. I truly meant what I had said. If there was no point of the friendship extending into love, I didn’t want to betray her anymore with my love in the guise of friendship. It would hurt to leave, but staying would hurt more. So I gave up my love. Then when I finally let her go, she came back to me.

‘Why now when I gave up? What happened to your feelings all this time?’

‘Your constant presence didn’t make me realise my love for you. But your absence did. Could you forgive me?’

I wanted to do that but I couldn’t do that easily. I wanted to feel loved, not just missed. I wanted to scream no. But then, I said yes. She did realise it and I didn't want it all to go for the sake of my ego. I was Ok with this. So my sister did bring us together. Maybe this is her way of loving. Don’t people show their love in different ways?


Comments

  1. You should have more. She shouldn't settle for just missing you. This is a sad story.

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